Lets Annoy People.....

Sometimes I like to annoy people, just because people annoy me sometimes and I like to give back to the world. Also, its really funny.



Specify that your drive-thru order is "to go."

If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub."

Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."

Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.

Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints by the cash register.


Repeat everything someone says as a question. (I actually do this alot...opps)

Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's road maps.

Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?", "What?", "Never mind, it's gone now."

Ask people what gender they are.

Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.

While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.

Sing along at the opera.

Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

Invite lots of people to other people's parties.


Practice making fax and modem noises.

Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

Staple papers in the middle of the page.

Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.

Tell people their accent isn't fooling anyone.

Drum on every available surface.

Set alarms for random times.

Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

Begin all your sentences with "Ohh la la!"

Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."

Sing the "This is the song that never ends" song from Lampchop's Play-Along.

Ask to "interface" with someone.

Never break eye contact.

Disagree strongly with everything anybody says.


Throw stones at people walking past your house.

Take photos of people walking down the street and then run away.

Stare at people for about five minutes, making sure they know you're staring at them. Then, slowly sneak up to them while humming the Mission: Impossible theme. Sniff their head, then run away. Repeat.

When walking down a main road, act like a drunk.

Move people's bookmarks ahead three pages when they aren't looking.

Wash and scrub the trees in your front lawn.


Stand on a busy corner. Gasp, look and point up. See how many people look.

Every time someone asks you to do something or says something to you ask "Is that a threat?"

While going down in an elevator scream, "AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!! WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!" for no apparent reason.

Whenever someone finishes a sentence say, "And then what happened?"

Super Glue quarters to floors.